I am hereby announcing my decision to give up my anime fandom.

Man, this feels like such a strange decision for me to make. I've been an anime-phile for five years now. But the thing is, I become too *much* of a phile. I can't seem to be a sensible person who enjoys watching anime occasionally and maybe visits an online forum about it.

No, I'm the sort who spends ages lingering in stores selling Japanese merchandise, the sort who can't seem to help making webpages about everything, the sort who goes on anime binges and watches 50-episode long series in less than a month.

It's not going to be easy to just give it up. I have so many anime-related things by now. Quotes and webpages and links and online pals all coming from or based off anime... a boxful of merchandise, anime images in my sig on forums, that sort of thing.

Also, it seems like anime has sort of become tied up in my identity. When people think of me they think "anime fan". I've started with some anime mannerisms, like putting my hand behind my head when I'm sheepish, or using sweatdropping smilies (^_^;;) in emails even to people who aren't anime fans. I've sort of started to think in the way anime characters speak.

This is part of my decision to give it up. I just don't feel entirely comfortable with the energy I give to anime. I don't believe that anime is evil, but I do think there are unwholesome elements to it that I shouldn't be exposing myself to so much.

There are also a couple of other reasons, better reasons, for my giving up anime but they're kind of personal. ^_^.

So anyway, yeah. I guess I've been leading up to this. I've got to live a life where I'm not caught up totally in some hobby; where I have the freedom to do anything. I've given up a couple of individual anime by simply not watching them for a couple of months, and I managed to cure myself of liking them, so I'm hoping I can do it for anime as a whole. It will feel strange to see cute anime merchandise and not look at it and think "ooh, there's that series, and that one, oh cool I want that".

I'm gonna keep enjoying anime music and jpop unless it proves a problem too. I don't think there will be a problem with that. What I am giving up is fanfiction, buying anime stuff, watching anime, anime webpaging and visiting forums to discuss anime. I may slip up from time to time but I can finally make this decision seriously. It's going to be interesting.

Anyway, this is the final update of this site, and hopefully of any of my anime sites. Seeya. ^_^.

~*~

Update: Well, it's three or four months since I wrote the above. So far I've managed to stick to it pretty well. I haven't watched anime or read manga etc. You know, it wasn't so hard. I mean, there were times when I really found myself wanting to indulge in a particular series, and it felt sad to give my anime away, but I'm still happy with my decision and I feel it was the right one. I'd rather not have any strong ties to earthly things that aren't necessary. ^_^.

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